


Keep me where the light is.

by NotForOneSecond



Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: CAUSE THEYRE SOULMATES, Fluff, Ghost!AU, Humour, M/M, Romantic Comedy, Soulmates AU, aaron is the only person that can hear him, falling in love with the soul, lets see how this works, light comedy, maybe some angst? theres always some angst, roberts an annoying cranky ghost
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-10
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-02-13 03:37:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12975039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotForOneSecond/pseuds/NotForOneSecond
Summary: “Well, there is one explanation for it.”“What?” Aaron asked eagerly.“They’re called Anima Gemella Spirits. The Italians believe that when a spirit is stuck between the living and the dead, they have the ability to contact only their soulmate, to help guide them back to the living, It looks like you’ve found yours.”“Soulmate?! But I’ve never even met this bloke.”Aaron moves into his new flat, but how will he react when he finds out he's not alone?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone!
> 
> I'm back with my new WIP, which is the most out there thing I've ever written in my life, but its fun and i hope you all enjoy.
> 
> also I tried to not name another fic after John Mayer lyrics but I failed.

Cardboard boxes surrounded the room but it was finally starting to look like a home rather than organised mess. 

Aaron stood in the middle of his new apartment, a smile firmly on his face as he marvelled in his surroundings, a sense of pride filling him. 

He didn't have much, but it was a lot more than what he had started with. Just a backpack and a bike and nowhere to go at 16. He was destined for failure, always had been, but he made sure to prove them all wrong, made it his sole purpose. 

“That's the last of it mate, I think we deserve a beer.” 

Aaron turned his attention towards his best mate, Adam. They'd been friends since they were teens, practically brought each other up, more brothers than best mates. Adam had always believed in Aaron, and when he decided to start his own business, there was no doubt who he wanted by his side. 

Scrap wasn't exactly world domination, but it made them money, and Aaron had finally saved up enough to get his own place, something he never would've dreamed of back when he was a mouthy teenager wearing a cap and gold chain. Adam had been with him through it all; the family problems, coming out, growing up, there was nothing they hadn't experienced together. 

The apartment wasn't too flashy, one bedroom and a view of the city, but it was a good location and it was Aaron's and nobody else's, and that's all that really mattered to him. The asking price was a lot cheaper than anywhere else in the city, and he wondered why it hadn't been snapped up quicker. It was everything he wanted in a home, a true ‘lads pad’ as Adam deemed it, which just received an eye roll that was ever so Aaron. 

“Definitely mate.” He agreed as he made his way to the fridge, cracking open two beers. 

The boxes easily forgotten about, still discarded around the room. They opted for setting up the game console first, and working their way through a hefty amount of beers. 

It was the small stuff like this that Aaron truly appreciated, a man so easily pleased by good company and not much more, and everything was starting to have a really positive outlook. 

He finished off the last of his beer, reclining his new leather chair back as he watched Adam attempt and fail to kill off some zombie on his wide screen TV. He was so content, his lips twitching as he soaked up the new home smell. 

_What the fuck is this_

Aaron sat up straight, his eyes looked towards Adam, a look of determination on his face and his tongue sticking out ever so slightly as he concentrated on the game in play, his mouth firmly shut. 

“What?” Aaron questioned, an eyebrow raised in his friends direction, confusion riddled his face. 

Adam mirrored Aaron's confusion as he furrowed his brow, turning his attention to Aaron and repeating the same question. 

“You just said something.” Aaron accused, as if Adam was the one sounding crazy. 

“No I didn't bro, you're hearing things.” Adam chuckled as he returned his attention back to the TV, resuming his game. 

_Why are you in my house_

Aaron's head whipped around at a rapid pace, the same voice, but this time he was certain it wasn't Adam. The voice slightly deeper and sounded further away, and although Aaron had never heard this voice before, he felt like he knew it. He rubbed at his temple wondering what was going on as his face pales. 

“You can't hear that?” Aaron questioned, frustration creeping up inside him. 

“Hear what bro?” Adam asked, he was starting to get a slight look of concern on his face at his best friends actions. “Look, are you sure you're ok mate, you look like you've seen a ghost.”

_Wait, you can hear me?_

Aaron stood from his seat, his eyes wide and and head pounding as the the voice rang through his ears, sending a shiver down his spine. 

“Nothin', I think I've had one too many.” He laughed nervously at his best friend, putting the beer bottle down on the table and running a hand over his face. 

“Too right.” Adam chuckled that ever so infectious laugh and it instantly calmed Aaron, who laughed back. 

“I think I'll call it a night.” Aaron announced as he stretched his arms above his head, a yawn escaping from his lips. It had been a long day and the last thing he needed was his mind playing tricks on him, the best thing for it was a good night's sleep. “You can take the couch if you want.” He said towards Adam, picking up the empty beer bottles from the coffee table in front. 

“Nah you're alright, I'll get off, got a early start tomorrow.” Adam smiled as he stood from the recliner, grabbing his jacket off the back. 

“Right, ok.” Aaron replied as he walked his mate to the door, attempting to calm his nerves in the process. 

“Give us a bell if you need anything.” Adam grinned in his usual idiotic way, stretching his arms out and embracing Aaron in a hug. 

“Will do.” Aaron replied, patting his friend on the back a few times before releasing him and watching him disappear down the corridors. 

He rested his forehead on the closed door, an exhausted sigh releasing his lips, eyes heavy and head thumping. 

_Finally_

Aaron's head shot up as he leaped away from the door, eyes bulging out his head as he trembled lightly, heart pulsing out his chest. 

“Who are you?” He called out into the air, feeling idiotic and slightly terrified all at once. 

_I'll ask the questions in my own home, thank you very much ___

__The deep, manly voice curled around Aaron's head as he tried his best to shake it away._ _

__“Y-your home?” Aaron stuttered up towards the ceiling._ _

_Yes, my home_

__“No, this isn't happening.” Aaron demanded as he marched into his bedroom, his head still shaking in disbelief. “It's all in your head.” He reminded himself as he pulled out his headphones, furiously shoving them into his ears in hope to drown out the lingering voice he couldn't explain._ _

__“It's all in your head.”_ _


	2. Coldplay songs & Drill holes.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron come to terms with the voice in his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first propper chapter, its only short but i was desperate to get it up, the next on will be much longer i promise!

The low humming of music lingered in Aaron's ears as he woke from his sleepy haze. The blinding light of the sun stinging his eyes and he is cursing himself for not taking the time to put up his curtains yesterday. 

He pulls out his headphones, stretches out the kink in his neck as a yawn escapes his lips. He knows it's still early, can feel it in aching bones. 

There's still a throbbing in his head, an unfamiliar feeling in his body that he can't quite put his finger on, and he wonders did he even really drink that much last night?

He makes his way towards the kitchen, a hot brew and some buttery toast always does the trick when he's hungover. He sighs dramatically as the kettle fills up with water. 

_Are you always this grumpy of a morning_

“Agh.” Aaron almost screams as he jumps backwards away from the sink, spilling water all over the floor. 

It all comes back to him suddenly. The voice in his head, the pounding in his heart as he heard the words last night. It wasn't a dream. 

“What do you want?” Aaron calls into thin air, glad nobody is around to see him. 

_I told you last night, I ask the questions here_

“This isn't real.” Aaron shakes his head in disbelief as he pinches at the bridge of his nose, a pain pulsing behind his eyes. 'Ghosts aren't real' he thinks to himself. 

_You can't just stick some Coldplay on and pretend you can't hear me_

“It - it wasn't Coldplay.” Aaron demands with uncertainty and then he's wondering why he's defending his music taste to a voice in his head, feels instantly ridiculous. 

_Sure it wasn't_

“W-who are you?” Aaron asks, voice low and filled with hesitation.

 

_I'm Robert, and this is my house_

 

The name sends a shiver down his spine and an eruption in his stomach. _Robert._ Aaron repeats it wordlessly around his mind before speaking again. 

 

“It can't be, I live here, this is all my stuff.” Aaron argues towards the ceiling a he gestures around the room and he's beginning to feel frustrated. 

_But this is my home_

The voice argues back with Aaron but it sounds more defeated now and for some reason Aaron feels a pain in his chest, sharp and sad. 

“Are - are you - do you think maybe, there's a possibility.. you might be - uh, dead?” Aaron stumbles with his words, awkward and nervous as he talks to an empty room. His eyes are shifting around for any sign of movement but nothing catches his eye. His body stays tense and on edge. 

_I'm not dead!_

The voice is louder and defensive now and Aaron finds himself stumbling back slightly, a diminutive fear creeping up in his bones. 

He pulls his phone out of his pocket, sends an urgent text before he sends himself insane. His breathing is heavy, heart rate frantic. 

“Robert?” He calls out to the vacant room, after a few minutes pass, but he's met with a eerily silence. 

 

*******

 

It takes about 35 minutes for Adam to come knocking on Aaron's front door, loud and aggressive and in a state of panic. 

“What's up? You said it was urgent on your text.” Adam comes tumbling in, hi-vis jacket and chunky work boots that reminds Aaron that he was working at the yard today, covering for Aaron who was fishing unpacking. 

“Yeah, I just need your help with something.” 

Adam eyes his friend suspiciously, before glancing around the room. 

“You haven't dragged me here to unpack more boxes have you?” Adam raises a eyebrow in the direction of his best mate, a frown on his face. 

“What? No! It's not that, there's just something-”

_Not this idiot again_

Aaron's head whips around manically, almost giving himself whiplash as the voice pierces his ears, the unexplainable feeling back in his bones. 

“Aaron mate, you alright?” Adam asks, a look of concern upon his face now as he watches his friend. 

“Did you hear that?” Aaron queries, eyes big and pleading for someone to confirm he's not crazy. 

“Hear what?” Adam speaks slowly, voice laced with worry as they both hover by Aaron's front door. 

“That.. that voice, calling you an idiot?” Aaron explains, all hands and facial expressions, watching as his friends face falls. 

“Should I be offended?” Adam jokes, because that's the type of person he is, making light of everything, but Aaron needs seriousness right now. 

“Adam, I'm serious.” Aaron says, his eyes are still big and searching around the room and Adam’s worries only heighten. 

“Are you sure you're alright mate?” Adam asks as he leads Aaron to sit, a comforting hand on his shoulder. 

“I'm fine, I just need you to hear what I can hear.” Aaron begs and he almost looks manic, a hand rubbing at his temple. 

“Do you maybe - I don't know, want to call your counselor?” Adam queries, careful with how he chooses his words. The last thing he wants to do is upset or offend his best friend, but his concern is growing. 

Aaron freezes. His eyes bugle wide and he looks at Adam with so much hurt and betrayal that he has to look away, can't look Aaron in his eyes. 

“You think I'm making this up?” Aaron asks in disbelief as Adam fiddles with a stray bit of cotton on his sleeve, but he knows he sounds crazy.

“No mate, I'm just saying you've had some stuff you had to deal with in the past, maybe you need to speak to someone that understands.” Adam explains, hand still firmly on Aaron's shoulder in what he thinks is the most comfort he can give. 

“It's - it's not like that.” Aaron stutters out.

He'd had trouble with his mental health before, Adam had stuck by him the whole way. Never judged or questioned, a true friend, exactly what Aaron needed back then to keep him on the straight and narrow, but he was better now, great in fact, hadn't felt the urge to speak to a counselor in years. He knew what Adam was getting at, voices in his head, his cousin had experienced a similar thing. But this was different, Aaron couldn't explain how but it was. 

“I- it's not just the voice, It's not just in my head, I can feel it, like someone else is here. Someone else is here… Robert.”

“Robert?” Adam asks, a name peaking his interest. 

“Yeah, Robert.. he said he lives here, that this is- was his home.”

Adam nods, worry falling from his face, like he is actually starting to believe what Aaron is saying. 

“What, so you think this place is haunted?”

“I dunno, I’m not going crazy though Ad, I swear.” Aaron promises his best friend, feeling slightly deflated. 

“I know mate, I know. So what you gonna do? Go see a physic.” Adam jokes, his body vibrating next to Aaron due to his chuckles. 

“Nah, they're all con artist.” Aaron laughs back, but the words stick in his brain. The idea seeming more and more like a good one as the seconds pass by. Someone who might be able to hear what he hears. 

“Are you sure living on your own is a good idea? You've been a bit isolated since Jackson.” Adam brings Aaron abruptly out of his thoughts. 

Jackson. 

The name stings. 

It's been 12 months since he lost him. The love of his life. 

They'd met when Aaron was a teen, struggling with his sexuality and full of anger and rage. It had worked somehow, they had worked. Aaron wasn't quite sure what love felt like, had nothing to compare it too. But he was certain what him and Jackson had was close enough, they'd promised each other forever, until that night, 12 short months ago. 

“I’m fine.” Aaron replies aimlessly, mind tracing over memories. 

He thinks about Jackson, thinks about the car flipping. Flashes of him being stuck, Aaron trying to pull him out, the small flame catching his eye. Within seconds the whole care was up in smoke and Aaron was being dragged back by a stranger's hand. 

There was nothing he could do. 

He'd tried everything he could, replayed it in his mind for weeks afterwards. He'd had the nightmares, remembers it all so well.

And then he's thinking about the voice - Robert. 

A ghost? His spirit? That's nonsense right. 

Because if there was such a thing, surely Jackson- it would be Jackson’s voice -

 

“Listen mate, I should really be getting back to work, but we can close up for the day if you know, you need me here or..I bet we could find a ouija board somewhere round here. ” Adam suggests, he'd noticed the blank look on Aaron's face. There's a lightness to his voice as he jokes but obviously still slightly worried about his oldest friend. 

“Nah mate, you get back to work, I'll be fine honestly.” Aaron pleads and he wonders if Adam thinks he's making this whole thing up. 

Adam stands from the sofa, eyes still wearily staring at Aaron as he heads for the door. He hesitates, gives Aaron the once over as he sits on the sofa, head in hands. Adam catches his eye as he looks up, a supportive smile thrown in his direction before he opens the door and leaves through it, leaving Aaron alone with his thoughts. 

_It's just you_

The voice is soft and light and it doesn't startle Aaron as much as it previously has. Almost like he expects it, feels the presence around him. 

“What is?” Aaron sighs into his hands, frustration taking over him. 

_That can hear me, it's just you. Nobody before - nobody has been able to hear me._

“So what? You sayin' I can talk to the dead or whatever.” Aaron snarks bitterly but there's only so much sarcasm he can use when he's having a conversation with a voice in his head. 

_I told you, I'm not dead_

It's more demanding now, as if he's certain of this.

“So tell me, Robert was it?” Aaron questions, stands from his sofa and makes his way over to the mirror on the wall just in front of his door. “Why can't anyone see you?” He raises a eyebrow at himself in the mirror, imaging this Robert standing behind him, but there's no reflection. 

_I don't know alright! I just know I'm not dead, and this is my home_. 

“What else do you know?” Aaron questions, still looking into the mirror, he's intrigued to say the least. 

_Nothing, the last thing I remember is being here, in my home._

There's silence for a few seconds and Aaron imagines this Robert thinking it over, trying to find some sort of relative memory. 

_It looks different though, but this is definitely my home. I remember being here, I remember.. the hole.. there's a hole behind that shelf_

Aaron's eyes dart around the room til they fall on a small shelving unit, one that was already there when he moved in. He makes his way over, moves it to the side slightly before spotting it. The rather large, deep hole in the wall that leads to a storage cupboard. A shiver finds its way down Aaron's spine as his eyes grow wide. He had no idea that hole existed, there's no way he could make that up in his head.

_I tried to put a photo up with an electric drill, got a bit carried away._

There's a laughter in the air and Aaron's shocked to hear such a beautiful sound filling his ears, feels his lip twitch. 

_See, I told you. I live here_

Aaron's face must be a tell tale sign because the voice sounds smug now, like hes proved himself right and got one over on Aaron. 

“But you don't anymore.” Aaron confirms, slight annoyance in his voice. “Is there nobody else you can talk to? A wife, a friend? Aaron asks, doesn't want the burden of this. 

_I - no, I don't think so_

There's a sadness in Robert's Voice, like the realization just hit him. That Aaron's the only person that can hear him. 

“Right well, I wish I-”

_You can help me_

Robert interrupts, his voice louder and more excited now, bouncing off the walls in the flat. 

“I really don't think I can.” Aaron confirms, a shake of his head as he walks around his flat aimlessly. 

_What? Of course you can. You can hear me, you can help me_

Robert's voice pleads, an almost desperate cry 

“Help you do what exactly?” Aaron asks, he's curious and feels some pity towards the voice roaming around his home. 

_Find out what happened to me, why I'm like this_

“I can't sorry,” Aaron dismisses

_Of course you can, I've not got anyone else to ask_

“I said no.” Aaron barks as the frustration gets the better of him. Fist clenched as his anger takes over, a problem of his he’s been trying his best to resolve. 

There's silence. Deafening silence and Aaron forgot what it felt like to not hear anything at all but his own beating heart.

A sensation leaves his body, the one he's not accustomed to yet and he feels instantly different, like before, but also emptier. 

He whips his head around the room, even though he knows he won't see him. There's a panic rising in him and he wonders if he's made a terrible mistake.

“Robert?” He calls, softer, friendlier. 

“Robert?!” Desperate, panicked. 

 

Silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you all think?!?! I'm so curious to hear your feedback, as ive never wrote anything like this before.
> 
>  
> 
> please leave any comments, i would be very grateful
> 
> thanks :)


	3. Unexpected bedroom guest.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron toys with the idea of helping Robert.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, I'm back and with a new update!
> 
> These chapters will vary in size, I'm far from consistent so apologies in advance and enjoy my crazy story!!

Aaron would be lying if he said he wasn't slightly disappointed in how quiet his apartment had been for the past 3 days.

He'd almost wondered if he imagined it. The soft, but deep voice, the twang that he felt in his heart every time he heard it, the feeling, as if he was somehow more of himself whenever it was around. 

And then he finds himself tracing a finger over the hole in the wall, the one Robert had told him about, the only evidence he wasn't going insane. 

Although his best mate would argue he was. Aaron wasn't surprised when he arrived at work this morning after his limited time off, a worried gaze received off Adam. 

He was met with questions instantly. Adam urgently wanting to know if he'd heard anymore voices and if he thought this Robert was haunting him. 

“I haven't heard nothing since that night you came round, just after you left.” Aaron confirms, trying to busy himself with some paperwork, hoping the subject would be dropped. 

“So what, you think he's given up?” Adam questions and Aaron wonders yet again if he's genuinely taking this seriously or just humouring him. 

“We erm - sort of got into an argument.” Aaron replied, a scratch to the back of his neck, one of his tell tale signs of being anxious. 

Adam let out a loud snort, which was only met with a warning glare from Aaron, before he continued. 

“He asked me to help him, I don't know, find out what happened to him or something, but I said no.”

“You said no? But why, maybe if you help this dude then he'll leave you alone, go towards the light or something.” Adam shrugs as he throws a pen in the air and catches it. 

He had a point, and Aaron knew it, but he wasn't so easily convinced. 

“And do what exactly? Find his family and tell them I see dead people, yeah right, they'll have me shipped to the mental house straight away mate.” Aaron scoffs, his shoulders broad and tense at the thought. 

“I thought you could only hear dead people.” Adam teases, a smile creeping on his lips, the one that Aaron can't help but not be angry at. 

“You know what I mean.” Aaron replies, throwing a scrunched up ball of paper in his best mates direction before sulking back into his seat. 

“I'm just saying, give it some thought bro, it may work in your favour.”

“Doesn't matter anyway, because he's gone now.” Aaron shrugs, a hint of disappointment in his voice that he tries so hard to hide. 

 

****

 

Aaron's exhausted by the time he eventually heads home from work, body stiff and gagging for a beer. He wants nothing more than to collapse onto the couch, maybe watch some  
Top great reruns. 

There's an eerily silence as he turns his key in the door and steps inside. The boxes now all discarded, everything in its rightful place and starting to look like a home Aaron can be proud of. 

There's an essence of something in the air as he closes the door behind him, he can't quite put his finger on it but it illuminates a feeling inside him, and he's almost certain he knows what it means. 

He goes to open his mouth, call out a name he's come accustomed to, but he's quickly beat to it. 

_Fluorescent is a good look on you._

Aaron's no longer startled by the voice, but he is surprised to hear it again, and dare he say a little relieved. 

“You're back?” He blurts out, curses himself instantly for sounding like a idiot as he shrugs off his Hi-Vis jacket and toes off his boots. 

_Back in my own home? Yes._

Aaron rolls his eyes, although he's not completely disappointed the voice is back, he really can't be dealing with going over this again. He sighs as he grabs a beer from the fridge and throws himself down on the sofa. 

“So what, you've come back here to haunt me because I said I wouldn't help you?” There's sarcasm in Aaron's voice but he is genuinely intrigued to know if what Adam had joked about was true. 

_Not exactly, although now that you've mentioned it.._

“So why are you back then?” Aaron's given up with worrying about how ridiculous he looks talking to the sky, nobody's around to see him, so he makes the most of it while he can, relaxes his body feeling more comfortable. 

_I can't leave_

Aaron frowns instantly at Robert’s words, there's a sadness to them, he sounds almost scared, younger and vulnerable, which is a ridiculous concept to Aaron, because the guy isn't alive. 

“So you just decided not to talk for 3 days?” Aaron's interests are peaked, and he's not going to admit it to the voice in the flat, but he feels slightly concerned. 

 

_I tried, it just goes black sometimes, sometimes for hours, more recently for days._

“Black?” Aaron questions, he’s sat up straighter now, beer bottle deserted as he listens intently. 

_Yes Aaron, black. One second it's like I'm here and I feel so alive and ..human and then out of nowhere there's a blackness and it's always the last thing I remember, until I see the light._

"The light?"

Aaron can hear the sigh in Robert's voice, marvels at how he can still feel annoyed, regardless to whatever is happening to him.

_Yes, I see a light and when I go towards it I'm back here._

"I thought the light was suppose to lead you to the other side of whatever, you know, to a better place?"

_Well that's bullshit. There is no better place, just darkness._

Robert's voice wavers, like he's shuddering at the thought and Aaron has to bite down on the inside of his cheek to stop any emotion showing. He decides on simply nodding, not quite sure how to reply, but he feels a twang of sadness wallowing around his body.

_That's why I need your help_

It's comes after a few moments of silence and it's tentative, almost a whisper.

“Not this again." Aaron sighs as he pushes himself off the sofa, busying himself in the kitchen.

_Please, you're my only hope, the blackness, it's more often these days, I'm worried that maybe one day I won't see the light._

“Maybe that's what supposed to happen? Maybe you're not supposed to fight it.” Aaron's speaks bitterly as he slams the refrigerator door closed, his breathing slow and steady.

_You know nothing._

There's venom in Roberts voice and Aaron can tell he's done with begging, quickly turning angry.

“I don't need this.” Aaron mumbles mainly to himself a he storms out of the kitchen and heads straight for the bathroom, slamming the door behind him

He flicks on the shower in hopes to drown out Robert's lingering voice, even though deep down he knows it's no use, can still feel the other man in his bones, that unexplainable sensation whenever he is around. It's quiet and Aaron finds himself surveying the room, hesitating before he pulls off his black long sleeved top and shimmying out of his jeans. 

The water is hot and relaxing to his muscles as he stands under the falling water, head held back and eyes closed in bliss. Although Robert is still lingering, there's no noise and Aaron is happy that he at least appreciates him wanting space for a small moment.

He's picking his phone up off the side of the sink as soon as the towel is wrapped tightly round his waist, a quick text to Adam about some beers and an escape plan in place.

The air around him shifts slightly once he's dressed, staring into his bathroom mirror as he picks up his hair gel, fingers running through his now dried, soft curls.

 

_Don't wear the gel_

Robert sounds soft and almost likes he's asking for frogiveness and Aaron's shoulders tense for a moment.

“How long have you been there for?”

_Long enough._

There's a playfulness to his tone, smug and irritating to Aaron. It's almost as if Robert senses the irritation as Aaron shakes his head in the mirror, because his voice turns soft and kind again, has Aaron wondering if anybody else has the pleasure of hearing such a sweet sound.

_Please just think about it, you're the only person I can talk to._

This has Aaron's back up again, a sigh of frustration leaving his lips as he storms out the bathroom, grabbing his coat on the way.

“I'm going out.” He announces, knowing fully well he doesn't need to explain himself but still feeling the need to anyway.

He slams the door shut behind him as he shrugs on his jacket, curls loose and free of gel. 

 

 

***

 

It doesn't take long for Aaron to be stood across the street from his favourite club, Adams silhouette outside the door. He's met with a slap on the back and one of Adams usual ‘Yes, Aaron’ greetings.

“It's been too long, you and me out on the pull” Adam jokes as they make their way inside the nightclub.

It's not too crowded, the night still early. It's one of the only gay bars in the city that doesn't have nightly drag acts and where you can actually play pool, which has made Aaron a regular so to speak.

He laughs off Adam's comment as they head to the bar, signalling for two pints and relaxing into a stool. The bass of the music vibrating through Aaron's body is relaxing him and somehow filling the empty void he's felt since leaving the apartment.

“So what made you wanna come out tonight?” Adam questions as he licks the foam off his top lip, a dopey smile on his face

“Just needed to get out the house.” Aaron shrugs in reply as he takes a sip of his own pint, surveying the club.

"Nagging boyfriends?" Adams cracks, laughing at his own joke. 

"You what?" Aaron's scowling 

"You're ghostly lover."

"Get lost. No I just wanted to get out." 

“Been that long has it” Adam nudges at Aarons side as he makes himself laugh more. 

Aaron just forces a smile, busying himself with his pint, deciding it's best not to mention hiwcright his best mate is. 

 

 

They're about 4 pints in when the club starts to get busy. There's people dancing on the sticky, sorry excuse for a dance floor and Adams chatting to a girl Aaron is already certain he won't be going home with. 

He's keeping to himself, propped up at the bar with a drink in hand. It's what he's good at. Curling into himself and trying to act invisible when he doesnt want to be bothered, but tonight's not the night, as a tall bloke with mousy brown hair swept back off his face comes straight towards him.

“Haven't seen you round here in a while.” The tall brunette smiles towards Aaron, one elbow propped on the bar as he slides into Aaron's personal space. 

Aaron's diverted eyes and hunched shoulders have failed to make him unapproachable, as he inwardly sighs and turns to flash a smile in the other mans direction. He's spent the majority of the night in a self debate over helping Robert, and this could be just the distraction he needs.

He doesn't reconigse the bloke, but that doesn't stop his appreciative gaze traveling down from the mans deep brown eyes and across his defined jaw line, before giving his body a once over. With a quick lick of the lips and a nod to himself, Aaron puts on what he imagines is his best flirtatious smile, diving straight into his distraction.

It doesn't take long of course. There's something about Aaron's smouldering looks and dark features that has men falling over themselves around him, and tonight's it's worked to his advantage as he finds himself sending a suggestive nod towards the door.

Adam's smiling like an idiot, throwing up a thumb while the girl by his side is looking more bored than ever. Aaron slips out the club into the night air, the tall brunette following closely.

 

Aaron's apartment is closest. That's how they've found themselves drunkenly falling through the door. Aaron's hand gripping at the other blokes jacket. Jake? Maybe, it didn't really matter to Aaron, as long as it distracted him for long enough to fill the empty void that he was feeling inside of him. 

There's kisses on Aaron's neck and he's walking backwards to his room as he feels hands on his belt buckle. 

A smirk finds his lips as he takes control, pulling at the other mans shirt to reveal a toned bare torso. With a swift movement Aaron dips his head down, starts kissing at the newly revealed skin. 

_Well this is unexpected._

For a moment Aaron almost forgot the sole reason he needed a distraction. He jerks up, eyes rolling as his body tenses. 

“You alright?” 

Aaron looks down, the smooth voice below him as he straddles the other mans hips. 

“Never better.” Aaron replies in what is his most sultry voice, darting his lips back down to the bare skin. 

He wonders if he just ignores Robert, maybe he'll go away. 

Chance would be a fine thing. 

_You could do better._

“Shh.” Aaron hisses into the mans neck without thought. 

“I didn't say anything.” The brunette replies. 

_He definitely waxes his chest._

“Will you be quiet.” Aaron spits as he busys himself with the other mans belt buckle, frustration creeping up inside him. 

“What?” The brunette is furrowing his brow in Aaron's direction now

“Nothing.” Aaron's mumbling. 

He's sobered up now, the tension in the room changing as he attempts to undress the other man, mainly to prove a point more than anything as he tries and fails to ignore Robert's words. 

_Is that a third nipple?_

“Will you just shut up!” Aaron shouts out into the air, jaw clenching as the irritation gets too much. 

He calms his breathing, exhales deeply before his eyes grow wide and he realises what he's done. 

He looks down towards the other man, lying underneath Aaron as he sits up on the mans hips, he's got a look of horror on his face as he gawps at Aaron. 

“I - uh - I can -.”

“I need to go.” The brunette shoots up, wriggling under Aaron's body as he starts to collect his clothes, running out of Aaron's apartment shoeless and shirtless. 

Aaron sighs, pushing his face into his pillow and wanting to let out an all mighty scream. 

_Thank god_

Aaron rasies his head, jaw clenching as he runs his hands over his face. 

“Seriously?” He questions to the ceiling, the fight has left him now and he just feels exhausted. 

_I have to keep myself entertained somehow while I'm stuck here._

Robert's smug and Aaron can almost picture him smiling. Wonders what his lips look like, if the smile reaches his eyes. 

He's letting his thoughts run away from him and he has to remind himself how ridiculous it is, to be attracted to a voice, to wonder what this Robert looks like, how he smells. For all Aaron knows he could be an old man with a beer belly. 

“Ok, I'll do it.” He sighs in frustration as surveys the room, looking for some sort of reaction. 

_Do it?_

Robert questions, voice weary and tentative. 

“I'll help you, find out what happened to you or whatever. Anything to get you out of here.” Aaron gestures to the room around him, as he lets his eyes fall shut. 

_Really? You'll help me_

Robert's voice is full of surprise and excitement and a light in the room flickers for a second as if to show exactly that. 

Aaron's surprised, as he eyes up the light bulb, shakes his head out of the distraction and turns the light off before getting into bed. 

“I'll help you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me Know what you think. 
> 
> Any comments and feedback anonymous or not is very appreciated and come and say on Tumblr!


	4. Spiritual Shenanigans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron and Robert grow close & Adam & Aaron visit a psychic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick little update before Christmas!

It was a weird experience, becoming somewhat friends with what Aaron can only describe as a ghost

If anybody would of told him that he’d be sat on his sofa having an in depth conversation to a voice only he can hear, he would of said they were crazy, he thinks the same about himself right now. But it had become comforting in a way, natural to come home from work, collapse on the couch with a beer in his hand and call out Robert’s name, eagerly waiting for a reply.

Aaron engages in question, tries to find out as much as he can about the mystery man, but it falls short, Robert's memory incapable of remembering much at all. Aaron usually ends up talking about himself, he finds it easy, without judging eyes on him. They try to hatch a plan, of how exactly Aaron can be of help to Robert, in finding out what happened to him and hopefully helping his spirit be released or some nonsense like that.

A quick google of his name came up short of any information, and there's only one person in Aaron’s apartment block that actually knew anything about him. ‘A very lonely man’ the old lady across the hall had described him. When Aaron returned back to the apartment to Roberts hopeful voice, he didn't have the heart to tell him about her comments

“Right so i’m guessing you dont have any children?” Aaron thinks out loud, something he does a lot lately, as he lies flat out on his sofa, throwing a cushion in the air and catching it.

_And what makes you so sure_

Robert replies but there's no annoyance in his voice, he just likes to wind Aaron up often.

“Well…” he starts, sitting up properly now and taking a sip of his beer. “A middle aged man living in a one bedroom apartment in the city doesn’t exactly scream family man does it.” He shrugs, communicating with his hands once he puts down the beer.

_Middle Aged?!_

Aaron can hear the scoff in Roberts voice, can picture him making this certain face although he has no idea what his features look like. It's dangerous territory.

“Well, until you remember how old you are, i’m guessing you're close to the wrong side of 40 they way you judge my music taste.” Aaron chuckles lightly. For unknown reasons Robert can remember certain songs or TV shows when Aaron is listening around the house, but nothing else. It's not until something jogs his memory that Robert starts to remember. Like the brown stain Aaron was trying to wash off the white wall in the kitchen. Robert had piped up about some sort of unfortunate coffee spillage, laughing at the memory. It had Aaron laughing too, an image in his head of this mess of a man all clumsy and awkward.

_We’re getting nowhere_

Robert sighs, the defeat evident in his voice as the laughter dies down.

“Well, I’ve got an idea...sort of.” Aaron infroms. He’s cautious as he doesn't want to be laughed at, but he decides on telling Robert anyway

_Yeah?_

Robet’s voice is light and excited and Aaron bites back a grin, finds himself happy about helping this stranger trapped in these walls

“Yeah well, I was thinking maybe - uh, going to see a Psychic, you know, someone who might be able to speak to you too, know more about you or something.. I don’t know, it might not work or owt but..” Aaron’s stuttering, reeling off with his own insecurities about the idea, because even he’s not sure how much help it will be.

_You think it will work?_

Roberts voice is hopeful, and it makes something flutter in Aarons chest, makes him feel excited also. Because somewhere between Robert being an annoying voice he can't switch off and this weird and glorious friendship blossoming, Aaron’s grown fond of the spirit that is Robert, and he would never admit it out loud for fear or Robert overhearing, but he’s kind of glad he’s here, filling the loneliness Aaron hadn't realised was there in his life. 

 

“I dunno, but it's worth a shot, right?”

 

***

It’s late the next afternoon when it really hits Aaron what he's got himself into. He’s shrugging on his hoodie and heading for the door, one hand texting Adam that he’s on his way, the other fumbling in his pocket for his keys. He’d gotten up later than expected, one too many beers last night while trying to come up with a plan of action with Robert, and after a rushed shower and a quick slice of toast he’s already late for his destination. He still has this urge, to stop for a second, call out Roberts name to make sure he’s still with him. The blackness hadn’t happened to Robert for a few days now, but Aaron still found himself fearing that one day it will take over and Robert may not come back.

_Good luck_

Robert replies after Aaron calls his name, although it comes out hesitant and nervous and has Aaron wondering why he hasn't bothered to talk to him already this morning.

“Its’ you that needs the luck.” Aaron shrugs with an amused smile as he pulls the door open.

_Aaron_

It’s faint and sounds far away as Aaron hesitates, one foot out the door.

_Thanks for this_

Its nervous again, and Aarons not surprised because the poor bloke is probably putting all is hopes into this working and Aaron has no idea what the hell he’s even doing, in over his head. He smiles in return before closing the door to his apartment; to Robert.

 

He picks Adam up on the way, moral support he tells himself but he’s not feeling very supported as the giggling from besides him heighten.

“This is crazy mate.” He’s laughing in the passenger seat of Aaron's car as he fiddles with the radio.

“Well what else am I supposed to do.” Aaron sighs, plays it off as if it's more of a burden than reality

“I thought you said these were all con artist?” Adam raises a bushy dark eyebrow in his direction and he takes his eyes off the road for a second to chance a glance at his best friend.

“Suppose we’ll find out.” He shrugs as the car comes to a stop outside a old, dark looking building

 

They head inside the dimly lit building, Although the early spring weather was starting to warm up outside, there’s no natural lighting as they make their way through the bleak corridor.  
Aaron had been in a state of confusement when he’d spoken to the woman on the phone, who insisted he come over and see her. He couldn't quite understand how it would help him, if this so called physic didn't even come to his flat and attempt to speak to Robert. But as the strong smells of different aromas filled his sense, he found himself wondering what has he got to loose.

He heard Adam snort from besides him as they enter the room. It wasn't all crystal balls and ouija boards but the room is very dimly lit by candle light as their eyes fall upon a woman who looked to be at least in her late 60’s, a table separating them. 

“Ah, Aaron I see, we spoke on the phone?”

That part was correct, it was just addressed to the wrong person, as she looks Adam dead in the eye. Adam laughed loudly, making the older lady frown as he nudged Aaron forward.

“Uh - Yeah, Im Aaron.” he replied cautiously as they approached the two small chairs at the table.

There was a crash next to them, as something hit the floor, they both turned to find Adam catching a large dusty book as it falls from a cupboard, a guilty look on his face,

“Sorry, can hardly see in here.” He shrugs as he puts the book down and takes the seat next to Aaron

Aaron shakes his head in Adams direction, a look of annoyance mixed with embarrassment on his face as he turns back to the older woman and begins to talk.

“So, basically I moved into this flat and -”

“The Spirit is not with you.” The psychic interrupts in conformation.

“Uh - no, he's stuck to the flat, he can't leave.”

“When you're around him, how do you feel?”

Aaron hesitates, a quick side gland at Adam who's biting back a laugh before he exhales, preparing to embarrass himself. 

“I - uh - I feel, more of a person, there's something happening in my heart that I've never felt before, it sends a shiver down my spine, but not in a bad way. And when I'm not, there's something missing..empty, that I never realised until it had been filled…” 

He trails off, nervously biting at his nails as he eyes Adam from the side to gauge his reaction. His jaws hangs low a little as his brow knits in the middle, it's safe to say he wasn't expecting that. 

“Ah, Just what I thought, he's in your heart, I can feel him when you walked in.”

Adam rolls his eyes as he settles back into his seat, not believing a word that leaves the woman's mouth. 

“My heart?! Wait - Can you help me or not? He can't remember anything I thought maybe you could talk to him, help him or something, whatever it is you do.” 

The older lady sits back in her seat, she crosses and arm over her chest as a finger comes up to her chin as though she's thinking hard. Aaron let's out a frustrated sigh. 

“He's not the type of spirit I deal with, I can't help you.”

“What?!” Aaron spits out at the same time. “Told you.” Falls from Adams lips. 

“What do you mean you can't deal with it? Who do I have to see then?” Aaron asks angrily, furious about the woman wasting his time. 

“It's not a normal spirit, he's not dead.”

“Then what is he?!”

"Well, there is one explanation for it."

"What?" Aaron asked eagerly. 

"They're called Anima Gemella Spirits. The Italians believe that when a spirit is stuck between the living and the dead, they have the ability to contact only their soulmate, to help guide them back to the living, It looks like you've found yours."

"Soulmate?! But I've never even met this bloke."

Adam’s straight up giggling now, fist in mouth as he tries to muffle them, Aaron runs his hand angrily over his face. 

“Everyone meets their soulmates in different ways.” She shrugs, actually shrugs and Aaron's standing from his chair angrily. Curses the fact he's been so stupid to think this would work. 

“This is ridiculous.” Is all he can find to say as Adam stands with him, both of them turning to leave. 

“Oh and Aaron.” The older lady calls, now busying herself with a pack of tarot cards, not even looking up to meet Aaron’s eye. 

He stops, turns around to face the woman as he hovers by the door. 

“He can leave the flat, he can go anywhere with you.”

She says it absentmindedly, not ever raising to meet his eye. 

It only infuriates him more as he fights his way through the beaded curtain hanging on the door, storming to his car, closely followed by Adam 

 

***

He denies Adams offer of a pint, feeling drained and defeated he heads home. 

He just wants to chill out, have some time to himself, maybe sleep away the day but chance would be a fine thing. 

He feels it as soon as he walks through the door. The hopefulness, eagerness in his heart and he knows what's coming, winces a little at the thought. 

_How’d it go?!_

The excitement in Roberts voice pierces through Aaron and he tries to force a smile, but there's a pagn of guilt inside him and he feels like he's let the other man down, it kills him. 

“It was a waste of time.” He sighs, almost apologetically as he crashes on his sofa, hands running over his face, a sign of his frustration. 

_Oh_

Roberts disappointment swam from the room, it was like a icy cold breeze that hit Aaron right in the gut and down his spine. 

“Sorry Rob, I tried.” 

He feels awful, but he decides it's better than to go into detail. The words of the psychic hadn't left his mind since they were spoken, angering and saddening him but most of all confusing him. Soulmates? It wasn't possible, it sounded ridiculous even now as he spoke them in his mind, and telling them to Robert would only cause more embarrassment. 

_I appreciate it._

The room falls silent, Aaron's eyes squeezed shut as he tries to block out the days events, a thumping headache building as the seconds go by. He wants to talk to Robert more, is starting to realise just how much he relies on the company of his voice, but he doesn't know what to say, settles in the silence of his own breathing.

 

“Rob?” Aaron calls after what feels like a lifetime. He still feels whole, complete, and it's a sure sign that Robert is still around, somewhere. 

_Yeah?_

Robert replies almost instantly and Aaron wonders what he's up to when they're not talking. Does he just sit and wait for the day when he can be himself again. He imagines it a lonely life, or lack thereof. 

“Have you ever left the flat?” He questions. He sits up from his position on the sofa, remembering the very last thing the lady said to him. They way she spoke the words, it almost felt like a sign, something he needed to know. 

_Eh - no, I can't remember, I have to stay here._

“But have you ever tried?” Aaron asks, he stands walking aimlessly around the room before edging closer to the door. 

_I wouldn't know where to start, I've only ever been in the flat, only ever spoke to you._

Aaron listens as he opens the front door to the flat, his feet stepping over the divide as he starts to speak again. 

“Maybe you just need to focus really hard?”

 

Aaron suggests, he's hovering a little, before stepping fully out. 

_Focus on what? The only thing I seem to be able to focus on is you_

Roberts voice sounds a little frustrated as he speaks. But Aaron ignores it, closing the door tightly and walking a few steps down the corridor. He tries again. 

“Then focus on me, focus on my voice.”

He’s almost out the corridor and he hesitates when the voice doesn't come as instantly as it had. 

_Well obviously, you say it like it's that simple_

Aaron smiles, a massive beaming grin that makes his eyes sparkle and he feels a sense of pride. Like he's watching a baby takes its first steps, filled with glee. 

“Maybe it is.” He smirks, glad nobody is around as he steps out into the early evening air. 

_What are you in about?_

“Look around you Robert, we’re outside.”

Aaron can't contain his smile as he gesture around himself, the light breeze brushing through his hair as he hugs his body to warm up, he waits for Robert’s reaction. 

_I'm outside_

_I - I haven't seen outside in -_

He trails off,the happiness in his voice evident in Aaron's ears and his soul. 

“Yep, you're outside.” Aaron beams like a proud parent. 

_Thank you, Aaron. Thank you._

Aaron's just shrugs, there's a smile on his face that he can't seem to rid as he begins to walk back inside. 

When he gets in the flat, he pulls a beer out of the fridge. He’s suddenly feeling a lot better about his day. He rummages through his drawers for the bottle opener. 

_This is great, maybe this will help._

Roberts voice is beaming, bouncing off the walls at hitting Aaron's ears soft and gently.

“Yeah, we can head out tomorrow,try and - where the hell is it?” He trails off thought, still digging in drawer after the bottle opener. 

He stops in the second draw, a small black book catches his eye that he doesn't recognise and he pulls it out silently. 

His hand caresses it for a second before opening up and flicking through the pages. 

There's mumbling coming from Robert in the background, something about seeing the sky and he sounds like a kid at Christmas but Aaron's engrossed with his new finding. 

He stops at a page, there's scribbled handwriting and it doesn't look familiar at all but something tells him he should know it, that it means something.

It's an address. It's not too far from here and Aaron can only think that it must belong to Robert, maybe it's a clue. 

He smiles bigger, he’s noticed Robert has stopped rambling and is calling his name in a questioning manner, sounding rather confused. 

Aaron looks up, smiles widely in hope. 

“Fancy a little road trip?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think, it means a lot. I'm still not 100% sure if i like this story, its a bit different to what I usually write (very Robert based stories) 
> 
> but I'm enjoying it and I hope you enjoy too :)


	5. Road trips & reflecting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron and Robert go to visit a familiar face

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, hope you've all had a lovely Christmas. I've had two fics uploaded over the past couple of days but i really wanted to get the next chapter out before my birthday tomorrow, i hope you all enjoy.  
> I think we all need something to get us through this current storyline!!

It's been 2 days since Aaron had found the address. He convinced Adam to let him have the weekend off deeming it a matter of urgency. 

He's stood gathering his things in the living area, listening to Robert waffle on about the sky and the trees and outside. It’s warming his heart and irritating him all at the same time.

_Come on Aaron._

He's whining again, excited and impatient. It's almost like having a pet dog who wants nothing more than to go outside and play, yapping annoyingly until you give in and let it outside. Yep, that's exactly what this is like Aaron thinks to himself. 

“Alright give me a second.” Aaron's moaning as he grabs his keys and the black book with the address in. 

He makes his way to the car, certain Robert is with him regardless to whether he's talking or not. There's something about the excitement he feels inside him that confirms it as he turns the key and starts the engine. 

“I don't want you to get your hopes up Robert, that book might not even belong to you.” Aaron says cautiously. He knows Robert is desperate to find out what happened to him, he just wishes he could help more. 

_I know_

Robert sighs, his voice swimming through Aaron's small car, feeling much more closer than it has before. 

It makes his skin tingle. The hairs on his arm stand to attention.

_I have a good feeling though._

He continues and Aaron finds himself nodding along in agreement, because so does he. 

 

They don't drive for long, out of the city and down the country lanes filled with fields, most of the journey in silence other than the car radio. It’s pretty deserted and Aaron's wondering if his sat nav is taking him to the right place as he slows down for a flock of sheep. 

“Bit quiet round ‘ere ain't it.” He’s saying more to himself as he indicates and turns down a dirt road. 

_I know this place_

Robert’s sounding surprised as Aaron's imagining what his face looks like right now. 

“That's good, right?”

_I've been here before, I - I think I might of grew up here_

“Really?” Aaron's asking mirroring Roberts excitement as they drive into a private residence and park outside a large farm house. 

_A farm, I - I used to live on a farm_

Robert’s remembering and Aaron's smiling, before chuckling lightly in the driver's seat. 

“Didn't take you for a farm boy.” Aaron jokes, hopefully breaking any tensions that may be building. 

_I'm - I'm not, I left.. but I can't remember why_

“Are you ready to find out?” Aaron asks carefully, Robert’s tentative, he can hear it in his voice. 

_I guess so_

Aaron turns the engine off before stepping out the car, surely followed by Robert. The house is large and old looking, surrounded by fields of grass and broken fences. 

“Ready?” Aaron asks again, as he stands in front of the old wooden door, hand balled in a fist ready to knock. 

_Y-yeah_

There's uncertainty in Robert’s voice. Nervous and worried, Aaron wishes he could take his hand or squeeze his shoulder. Reassure him it will all be okay. He imagines the other man's hands to be soft and warm, like putting on a glove. He stops himself before his thoughts get any deeper, inwardly cursing. He can only use his words so that's what he will do. 

“It will be alright, Robert.” He says matter of factly before raising his fist and knocking loudly on the door 

There's an unsettling silence, the tensions swirling through the air around them, Aaron looks behind his shoulder, feels the presence of Robert right next to him before smiling encouragingly and knocking once more. 

The bang of Aaron's fist echos around the old home as they wait. There's mumbling coming from the other side of the door, footsteps down a creaky old staircase and Aaron's smiling bigger now, more supportive, he hopes Robert can see. 

The old wooden door swings open, there's a warmness that flows out of the house and a smell of lavender that screams homely as Aaron’s eyes settle on the person in front of him. 

There's a slim, blonde woman, eyes as blue as a clear summers sky and hair straight, fair and blowing with the gush of wind that came with opening the door. She smiles politely, she looks honest and kind and it instantly relaxes Aaron as he smiles back, forgetting why he's here for a moment. 

“Hi, can I help you?” Her soft, Yorkshire voice alerts Aaron as to why he's here and his smile falters for a second when Robert doesnt speak. 

“Eh - yeah I was hoping you can actually.” Aaron smiles back and if Robert was here in person he'd be nudging an elbow in him right now. 

He waits for a second, an awkwardness falling between the two living souls when Aaron doesn't elaborate, but there's a change in the air, a change inside of Aaron. He knows the feeling, it's related to Robert and it's like a panic building up inside of him. 

Without a second thought, without hesitation Aaron's whispers his name. “Rob?” 

It's filled with worry and concern and for a small moment Aaron completely forgets where he is. 

“Sorry?” The blonde asks, soft features turning into an instance confusion as Aaron whispers to himself. 

_Katie_

It's all Robert manages to say, it's broken, like a small cry filled with fear and Aaron's worrying more. 

“Katie?” He repeats

“Yeah, that's me.” The blonde, Katie, confirms from her position in the doorway but she's looking even more confused now. 

_I - I know her_

Robert says and it's softer now, likes he remembering fond memories and Aaron can’t help but feel a pang of jealousy before he remembers how ridiculous that it, shakes it away as he sways awkwardly in the strangers front garden. 

“Great.” Aaron replies, more to Robert than to Katie but it's directed to her. “I was wondering if you could help me with something, do you know a Robert Sugden?” Aaron smiles widely.

The smile doesn't last long, when Katie's face falls a little at the name. Her mouth hangs open before she composes herself, nodding a little and trying to find the words. 

“Erm - yeah, I - we do.”

Aaron takes note of the We, nodding in reply to Katie, he opens his mouth to speak but he's interrupted. 

_We - we need to go_

Robert’s panicked again and he almost sounds a little scared, Aaron can't keep up with it. 

“We can't go?” He argues to the sky which only makes Katie frown more. 

“I'm sorry?”

“Sorry, erm.. I was wondering what you could tell me about Robert?” Aaron asks more calm, he's desperately clinging on to the hope that she will confirm he's at very least still breathing.

_Aaron, we need to go_

Aaron ignores Robert, smile never faltering in front of Katie who also seems to be mirroring the panic that Robert is. 

“Uh- I don't think this is a very good - you've got the wrong house.” Katie backtracks, stumbling over her words as she looks behind her shoulder. 

“But you just said you know him? Look I'm just wondering if you could tell me what happened to him.” Aaron’s pleading, hoping Katie won't slam the door in his face. 

_I mean it Aaron, we shouldn't be here_

“Katie?!” There's a loud, deep voice coming from the top of the stairs, manly and strong with accent. “Who is it?”

Aaron tries to catch a glimpse of the man over Katie's shoulder, she closes the door over a little more but doesn't quite shut it. 

“Look, I've got to go.” She says, hands hesitating over the door as the footsteps make their way down the staircase. 

_Aaron, NOW!_

Roberts angry, angrier than Aaron has ever heard him and he's conflicted. Head snapping between what he imagines where Robert is and where Katie stands.

He panics, hurriedly pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket that he's prepared earlier. He wasn't sure how this would go, but he assumed it wouldn't be good. 

“That's my address, if you can think of anything..please.” He's almost begging in a rushed voice as he pushes the small piece of paper towards Katie. She grabs it quickly before she closes the door in his face but not quite before throwing an “I won't.” In reply. 

Aaron's shoulders drop, he lets out a breathe he didn't realise he was holding and a sigh of exhaustion before his posture turn’s angry. 

“What the fuck was that Robert?” He questions to the sky as he walks back to his car. 

There's no reply and he stops dead in his tracks, whips his head around a little before his voice gets softer and more vulnerable. “Robert?”

_Can we just, go home please._

He replies, defeated and sad and Aaron doesn't have the heart to argue, or correct him about his use of home. So he drives. Drives in silence, feeling the beat of Roberts heart right next to his own deep inside his chest.

 

******

 

“Are you going to tell me what that was all about?” Aaron's asking a couple of hours later when they're back at the flat, he's hunched over on the sofa, head in hands and he's been going over the days events ever since they got back 

_There's nothing to tell_

Robert reassures but the uncertainty in his voice tells Aaron otherwise. 

“Who was the woman, Rob?” He's softer now, because he can hear something in Roberts voice that tell him this is hard for him. 

_Katie_

It's all Roberts gives. The name is strained in his voice and Aaron refrains from rolling his eyes at the obviousness of the answer, hopes he will continue. 

_She's my brothers wife_

Aaron frowns in confusion, it doesn't make sense.

“Why did you want to leave? Aaron asks carefully, can hear the strain in Robert’s voice. He remembered something today, something he'd much rather forget. 

_We - we don't get on, me and my brother.. they wouldn't of knew anything, it was a waste of time._

Aaron nods, he doesn't believe it but he nods. There's a sadness, that their only lead is now lost, defeat has never been Aaron's strong point. 

“So, back to square one.” Aaron says a little more cheerful, hoping to change the subject. 

Robert’s story doesn't add up, his reaction, Katie's reaction, it's all a mess inside his head but Aaron's choosing to move forward, because he has no other choice. When Robert doesn’t reply, aaron stays sitting in silence for a little while, not quite sure what to say.

_Who's Jackson?_

Aaron's startled by the question. His eyes are wide and sad and there's no doubt that it's written all over his face. He feels sadness instantly, he clears his throat, swallows down the lump in his throat and lets it fall into his gut along with the nausea feeling that's already lingering there. 

“What?” Aaron asks, trying to play off the question. But Roberts everywhere. He's all around him, inside of him and there's no point in lying. 

_I heard you and your mate talking about him, who is he?_

It's a simple question, there should be a simple answer but for some reason Aaron can't find it. He goes with the obvious. 

“My ex.” He replies vaguely, hoping he won't have to go into detail. 

_What happened to him_

Robert’s asking softly. It's encouraging to Aaron, makes him want to talk about something he's buried so deep. 

“He - uh - he died, last year.” Aaron sniffs hard, pushing back the tears that are teasing his eyes. 

_I'm sorry_

Robert doesn't push further. Knows that Aaron has given all he wants, and that's enough for today. 

They sit in silence for a long time, both men reflecting. It feels almost different now, more open. They've been more vulnerable with each other today, seen a side they've not experienced before, learnt new things. 

Jackson’s on his mind, more Prominent than he has been in a long time. 

He sits, he remembers. Things he's tried to forget, things he needs to let go of, after all this time. 

 

Flashes of him reaching inside the car, just a little too out of grip to grab him. 

Being pulled back as the flames grew higher. 

Flashes of their argument moments before. 

How he was breaking up with him, how he got out of the car.

Flashes of him in the hospital, watching from outside the room as they call it. 

Breaking down on the floor. 

Flashes of not behind able to save him. 

How he wished he could save him. 

Aaron's not sure how long it's been, sitting in his dimly lit living room. No TV, no phone, just his thoughts and Roberts presence for company. Because even when no words are spoken, he still feels him there. Like a squeeze of a shoulder and a reassuring smile. Even though he can't see them, he can feel them. 

He stand from his position on the sofa. Tired and drained of emotion. 

He turns towards the bedroom, stopping with hesitation for a moment. 

“Rob?” He calls, the shortened version of his name becoming his new favourite thing to fall from his lips. 

_Yeah?_

There's a hint of a smile as he hears the reply. He sounds groggy, and husky and a little startled. 

“We’ll save you from this.” He tells him, filled with determination and hope regardless to the days events.

He will save him. This time, there's no doubt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you all think? I hope you all enjoy and ill try and update again soon, but for now i'm going to celebrate my birthday and new years.


	6. Beauty & The hospital bed.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron gets an unexpected visitor and an unexpected surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've neglected this story so so so much, I can only apologise, but it took a lot to write this chapter for one reason! But it's here and I thank anyone who is still reading, hopefully you will enjoy :)

The Silence came gradually, then all at once. 

In the void of sound, all Aaron’s thoughts are laid bare, screaming inside his head. 

 

There was positivity in the day’s following the visit to Robert’s home village, Aaron had made sure of that. They’d discuss plans and ideas of where to go from there, if they should make a visit back to the village and hopefully refresh his memory. Robert was involved less day by day, what started as excited communication between the two faded out to occasional grunts and defeated agreements until eventually, there was no reply at all. 

Aaron never questioned it the first day, was making excuses to himself by the second, and now, on the third day of silence from Robert, he was officially worried.

It had started to creep up inside him; the fear. The utter distress at the possibility of never hearing Robert’s voice again. The man he never got to know. The flat was empty, his heart felt halved and there was a sadness inside him he just couldn't describe. Almost like he was grieving for someone he never knew, something that could never be. Conflicted by his own thoughts and feelings, he had invited Adam round in hopes to distract him. 

 

“So, you just turned up at this woman's house?”

Distractions weren't Adams strong point.

“Yes.” Aaron sighs into his tea, eyes up to the ceiling in annoyance.

“And said what? I’ve got a dead guy here who wants to talk to you?” Adam asks, mouth full of biscuits as he leans against Aaron’s countertop.

“What?! No!” Aaron replies a little bit too defensively, eyes searching the room out of habit just incase Robert is listening in. “I just asked her if she knew anyone by the name.”

“And what? She freaked out?”

Aaron had already explained what had happened briefly, because he didn't quite feel like dwelling on it, but Adam wasn’t quite giving up. 

“He said they didn't get on.” Another sigh leaves Aaron’s lips, almost feeling like he needs to defend Robert, because he can't defend himself, but mostly because he has this overwhelming urge to.

Adam scoffs loudly. “And you believe that?”

“Why wouldn't I?” Aaron narrows his eyes towards his friend.

“Just all seems a bit weird, that's all mate.” Adam replies, hands up in a surrendering manner as he gulps down the last of his tea.

 

Aaron doesn't reply, fears for his emotions to take over. He simply shrugs his shoulders as his lips turn down, sipping on his own tea. 

They resume in silence for a few minutes longer until Adam is making up excuses and saying his goodbyes. Aaron doesn't see him out, stays standing propped up against his kitchen counter, when he hears a hesitated call of his name.

“There's a beautiful blonde at your door mate.”

“What?” Aaron asks as his brow knits in confusion, making his way towards the front door.

He turns the corner, finding Adam still stood at his front door, hand gripping the handle. To his surprise, his eyes land on a nervous looking Katie, stood out in the hallway.

“Kaite? Hi.” Aaron breathes out when the shock dissolves. Her eyes are shifty as she tucks a stray blonde hair behind her ear and smiles politely.

“Are you not going to introduce me?” Adam feigns offence as he flashes what he thinks is his best smile towards the blonde in Aaron’s doorway.

“I thought you had somewhere to be.” Aaron raises an eyebrow in the direction of his best friend. Adam takes the hint, laughing a goodbye into his best friend. 

“Nice to meet you.” He tells Katie before stepping past her and out the door.

“Sorry about him.” Aaron’s awkward as he stands to the side of the door, arm gesturing towards the apartment “Come in?”

Katie hesitates before walking into the apartment. Aaron can sense her nerves as she slowly takes a seat, diverting her eyes from Aaron’s stare

“I...I didn't think I’d hear from you.” He says as he sits on the chair over from her, his foot nervously bobbing up and down.

“I wasn’t going to come…” Katie trails off, she's got the piece of paper with Aaron's scribble on in her hands, fiddling it between her finger.

“But you did?” He encourages her.

“You wanted to know about Robert.”  
It's more of a statement than a question as Aaron notices the waver in her voice as she speaks his name.

“Yeah, he’s.. He’s an old friend” Aaron thinks quickly as Katie nods, seeming pleased with the answer.

“It had been years since I last saw him.. Since he left” Katie starts to speak but her eyes are looking at her hands and she's lost in thoughts and old memories. “Things with Andy had gotten out of control and he’d left the village.”

“Andy?” Aaron interrupts, the name unfamiliar to him 

“Yeah, His brother.” Katie gives him a confused look before continuing. “We got a call, off Victoria when the accident happened. She wanted us all to be there for him when he woke up..” She trails off.

Aaron’s heart is pounding, his mouth has gone dry and there's a sickening worry in his stomach at the word accident. His pulse is loud in his ears suddenly, and he finds himself thinking the worst.

“Accident?” It comes out like word vomit, strangled and scared.

“Yeah, the car accident.” Katie confirms.

The pulse in his ears becomes louder, as he lets out a shaky breath. The feeling feels familiar, flashes of what happened to Jackson come back to him and he feels lightheaded.

“Are you ok?” 

Katie’s voice brings him out of his trance as he coughs a little, nods his head in response. 

“We visited, at the beginning but it all got a little too much for Andy, he’s stubborn, refused to go and see him. That's why when you came round, I couldn’t say much.” Katie smiles apologetically at him as Aaron takes in everything she is saying.

“Where is he now?” Aaron questions, nervously. 

Roberts presence has been gone for days and there's a sad look in Katie’s eye that makes Aaron thinks he’s going to be told the worst. He bites hard on his lip in anticipation as he feels the tears sting the back of his eyes.

“He never woke up, he’s still in a coma, going on 5 months now..” She trails off, her voice soft and quiet at the truth of her words

“He’s still alive?” Aaron asks, a heavy breath releasing from his lips, the relief of the situation making him more at ease.

“Yes, he’s alive, but that's all I know, I’m sorry.” Katie replies kindly. The tears brewing in Aarons eyes mirroring her own. Its obvious Robert meant a lot to her at some point in their lives.

“Can - Can I go and see him?” Aaron asks anxiously, as he rubs his nose with the back of his sleeve.

“I don't see why not.” Katie smiles reassuringly

 

****

 

Katie leaves briskly once she’s filled Aaron in on the details. She denies the cup of tea and sends him a warm reassuring smile that has Aaron feel somewhat calm for a few moments.

That’s until he’s speeding in his car towards the hospital Katie had told him the details off. His hands clammy against the steering wheel and his heart pouncing off his chest. He’s almost frantic and he’s not sure what to expect when he arrives the hospital, but he’s not given much time to think as a nurse is directing him to Robert’s ward.

Aaron hates hospitals. He avoids them at all costs, yet here he is, and all in the name of a stranger.

He makes his way down the corridor, it's eerily and bright and it hurts his eyes and his heart when it brings back memories of the night with Jackson.

He remembers falling to the ground, curling in on himself as the doctor had told him the news. He recalls the heartache, the sadness, the defeat of not being able to save him. It feels all too familiar and has Aaron’s breath not releasing from his lungs and his head spinning. 

He has to take a seat and calm his nerves. There's nobody around, the place is silent and his thoughts are screaming. He stands up, the number on the door in front of him big and bold and there’s a frightening aspect to what lays behind it. 

He nods his head to nobody but himself. Inhales deeply and grabs the handle, pushing the door open.

The beeping noise is the first thing he notices. Piercing his ears making them feel like they're ready to bleed. He feels himself become warm and a over familiar feeling takes over him. He knows he’s here. Robert’s here.

“Robert?” He can’t help himself, has this urge to call his name and smile. He feels lighter, happier already.

_Aaron?_

Its soft to his ears and warm in his heart and he lets the smile fill his face as he steps further into the hospital room. 

“You’re here?!” Aaron beams

_Where are we?_ Robert questions, he feels close around Aaron and it's comforting.

“We’re at the hospital.” He tells him, his eyes are still up to the ceiling searching for a sign.

_Why are we here?_

That's when Aaron remembers, his eyes drop down to where the beeping noise is coming from, they fall on a bed, a body. Robert.

“We’re here to see you.” Aaron whispers, he takes slow steps towards the bed, his breathing slow and steady and his steps light as if not to alarm Robert.

He approaches the bed. A small gasp releasing his lips. 

His eyes take in the man in front of him. Weeks of wondering and imaging the face to go with the voice, but nothing would of ever prepared him for this.

He takes in the tousled blonde hair, it’s long round his ears due to months of lying in a hospital bed, Aaron has the urge to sweep it out his face. There’s a light shadow of hair appearing on his jaw line due to not having a shave. His eyes are closed which has Aaron wondering what shade of blue, or green they may be, his long blonde lashes caressing his cheek. He follows the freckles across his nose and scatters down his cheek. Aaron impulsively brings his hand up and runs the back of his finger across Robert’s cheek.

He’s younger than Aaron imagined. There’s no scars or bruises or blood, he looks peaceful and healthier and,

“Beautiful.” 

 

_Why am I here Aaron?_

 

Robert’s voice flows through his ears and it startles him a little.  
His eyes stay on Robert, there’s a comfort in talking to a face, and a body, and not the sky. He graces his fingers down the length of his forearm, can't contain himself from wanting to feel the other man's skin.

“You were in a accident.” Aaron almost whispers, cant take his eyes away from Robert’s scatter of freckles. “You’ve been in a coma for 5 months.” 

_A coma?_

Robert’s voice falters a little, making Aaron look around the room.

“But you look so healthy, you’re not hurt, that's a good sign right?” Aaron’s not sure who he’s trying to convince more, himself or Robert.

_My family, these are my family_

Aaron follows the voice, there's a few photo frames and cards on the table at the side that he makes his way over to. He picks up one of the frames, It's Robert and a younger girl, they have the same feature, the same freckles and smile. 

_Victoria._ It sounds like there's a smile in his voice. _My sister, I remember._

 

“That's great!” Aaron smiles, placing the photograph back down and picking up a get well soon card.

_Andy's been here._ The joy in his voice has gone, its filled with confusion.

“Your brother right?” Aaron confirms as he reads the wishes inside the card. 

_Yeah._

“This is great, you’re remembering, maybe this will help. Do you remember anything from the night of the accident” 

_No, nothing._

“What if we try talking to you, maybe that will help?” Aaron says hopefully, taking a seat next to Robert’s body. He places his hand over the other man's, it’s warm, and inviting and he has the urge to intertwine their fingers.

_Wait._

Aaron freezes before quickly removing his hand. "What?”

_Do that again._ Robert asks and Aaron frowns

_My hand, touch my hand._

Aaron does as he’s told, Takes Robert’s hand in his own and relishes in the feeling of it. It makes his skin tingle and the hairs on his forearm stand to attention. Almost magical.

_I can feel it._

“You can?!” Aaron almost shouts with glee, squeezing ever so lightly on Robert’s hand.

_I can feel you, I can feel your hand._ Robert’s voice mirrors the excitement and it makes Aaron’s heart feel fuller as his eyes glisten looking down at him. 

He stays like that for a few seconds, Robert’s hand in his, his thumb caressing the skin, his smile wide as he looks down towards the blonde lying below him. He’s overwhelmed and hopeful and something inside him is taking over his body in an unexplainable way that he can’t help but feel butterflies in his stomach. 

“Who are you?!” 

Aaron jolts away from Robert’s body at the sound of voices, his hand dropping and feeling instantly cold. He turns, startled look on his face like he’s up to no good, he’s met with two women.

“Uh-“ Aaron hesitates. 

“So?” The younger woman has an edge to her, she’s confident in her voice, a challenging eyebrow raised. Aaron instantly sees Robert in her, recognises her from the photo earlier. 

Victoria. 

“I’m a friend, of uh- Robert, I heard about the accident, I thought I’d come and see him.” 

“Nice to meet you, pet. Sorry it’s not on better circumstances.” The older woman is polite with a hint of geordie in her voice, Aaron smiles nervously. 

Victoria still has a raised eyebrow, a skeptical look on her face and Aaron’s not sure she believes him but he doesn’t plan on sticking around to find out. 

“I’ve gotta get going now anyway, sorry.” Aaron makes his excuses and throws a limp wave in their direction. He doesn’t miss the doubtful look Victoria is giving him. 

 

He hesitates for a second, hoping to find some sign from Robert, to feel him again, but there's silence, emptiness and Robert’s family are looking at him with concern. 

He quickly leaves the hospital room, the door swinging on his way out and his heart seems to have rehomed in his stomach making him nauseous. 

He takes a deep breathe, unsteady and shaky as he leans his head against the hospital wall outside the room. A hand comes up to his mouth, he’s feeling everything all at once and when he closes his eyes all he can see is Robert’s face. The faint freckles that lead down his cheek, the unkept blonde hair that falls into his eyes. He can still feel the softness of his skin under his thumb and he has to swallow down hard to regain himself.

“Are you ok?”

Aaron’s eyes shoot open, there's a doctor in front of him looking concerned and Aaron just feigns a smile and a nod of the head to get rid of him. 

Aaron stands up a little straighter, making the decision to leave and give Robert some privacy with his family

He hears muffled voices and his curiosity gets the better of him, he steps a little closer to the closed door, listens more intently at Robert’s family speaking with the doctor. He wants to leave but something tells him to stay, he needs to stay, so that's what he does, lingers outside the door. 

“The decision needs to be made by the end of the week, Mrs. Sugden.” 

Aaron recognises the voice as the doctor who he had just interacted with.

“It’s just all too much.” 

The older woman's voice is shaky and sad, Aaron’s heart feels for her.

“The brain activity is low, he’s been on watch for months, We believe, the best thing to do would be switching off the life support machine.” 

There's a small sob released, its sounds young and fragile and Aaron assumes its Robert’s sister.

He lets the words run through his mind again, it hits him.

His knees buckle and he’s back on the wall, body weak and tears brimming. 

He starts to feel a panic build up in him, he can't seem to catch the breath getting away from him and the only thing that is on his mind is Robert being gone. 

He can’t lose him, he can’t let this happen, not again.

He doesn’t know how, but he won’t let this happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please Please let me know what you think, i'll hopefully get the next chapter out a lot quicker if people still want to read this mess of a story :)

**Author's Note:**

> what do you think??? let me know in the comments and feel free to come chat to me On Tumblr - notforonesecond
> 
> thanks .x


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